A little over a year ago, I took this extremely scary step and submitted my book to a publisher, which I also turned down, before rewriting about 75% of my book. (And I'm pretty sure you're wondering why I would even submit if I wasn't ready. If you don't already know the answer, then don't ask!) Since then, I have been adding more to each character so that they seem more realistic. Like people that you could actually see yourself having coffee or lunch with. Or someone that you would want to knock that crap out of if you ever met them in person.
I noted about a year ago where a couple of my characters came from and how much I really hated them. Terry is more or less a just jerk; all talk really. Brian is the one that hurt me the most to write. He is the one that makes me physically sick because he is so smug and believes that women are on this earth to serve and are less than men.
I bring this up because I am adding to a scene that will change things a little in my book. It was in the original version, but has changed quite a bit. When I was writing this scene, it was already hard because the main character is injured and although I wrote it, I still cringe. In my head though, there was still something missing. I just didn't know what it was.
In my head and on paper, Devyn, my main character, is telling what she saw, but I forgot to tell it so that the reader could feel how she felt, saw and heard at that moment. How the sweat was rolling down her back and how that sick feeling crept into the pit of her stomach. I had forgotten to describe the look in the persons eyes looking back at her or how.....
And I need to stop.
I'm in the library right now, and I have to say that I got chills while feeling sick having to put myself in Brian's shoes (yes, I know that I gave away a detail, but it was necessary here!). It was needed to make sure the reader got the full effect and I have to say it terrifies me to know that there are actually people out there like him!
Yes, I rambled quite a bit tonight, but I remember warning you that I would do this sometimes when I started this blog over a year ago.
Am I going crazy for nothing? I really hope not.