I can't even begin to tell you how many times I have opened a new post, hoping that maybe, just maybe, I could think of something to say. Or open a notebook in hopes that words in my head would flow through my fingers onto the page, but as you can see, neither has happened. No real inspiration, I guess.
I will admit that this year has been a real eye opener for me, mainly because I am forcing myself to consider the possibility that I could and should want more for my life. To live it rather than let it pass me by. To consider the idea that I am worthy of enjoying life, rather than sitting on the sidelines, cheering on those around me. It's one thing to be told this over and over, but to realize it for myself means so much more.
After years of thinking that maybe school was something that wasn't meant for me, I have taken the plunge and have enrolled to finish my prerequisites at the local community college before transferring to a year program. What an amazing feeling.
I have already begun planning my trips for the year. After reaping the benefits of that last year, I now know that this is something that I have to continue or else, my day to day life will wear me out and its really not worth it.
Tonight, I went to see the movie 42, a movie about the late, great Jackie Robinson. A man who changed the game of baseball by changing people's perception of racism in sports, by doing what he did best: playing the game the only way he knew how and not letting the world tell him that he couldn't. Like anyone, the pressure of course got to him, but what I loved about this movie and this man is that he never let the cameras see him crack under the pressure. Had this have happened, the man we now know as a legend would have been sent back to where he came from and baseball or any sport for that matter would have continued along the same road it was on, never changing. But he didn't. This man is a true inspiration and legend.
The owner, Branch Rickey, who pushed for Jackie Robinson was in his own right was brilliant. This man never listened to the nay-sayers when they said signing him would be bad for the sport. It was his love for the sport and doing what was right that started this change, bringing to light the real issue that the country faced at the time. Showing that maybe racism was tainting this game that people loved.
The movie, from start to finish, was amazing, brilliantly done. I am far from being a baseball fan, but I love history and this was an important to not just baseball, but American History that should not be forgotten.
Go check it out...it is worth every penny.
So, I realize that this is an extremely heavy post, but I guess that's just how it goes.